Three things can happen when we decide that we’re taking a big leap forward.
- We experience rejection
- Our inner critics hijack us
- We hit new roadblocks
If you’ve been experiencing any of these things, CONGRATULATIONS! You are betting more on your future than on your past.
REJECTION
Rejection can look like getting passed up for a promotion, not being asked to come to the table or flat out being denied an opportunity for connection or growth. Rejection sucks, it hurts, and it can rock us to the bones.
Our hearts break over these things. Sometimes they fuel us to go harder, other times they stop us in our tracks. Rejection can make us question our decisions and even more deeply, who we are at our core.
The chance of rejection increases when we decide we’re ready to step out of status quo. That’s because wanting more comes with risk and uncertainty.
Stepping out of the status quo can look like going after a new opportunity, demanding more from others, or speaking truth to power. It can also look like talking about something outside of your typical arena, or pitching a new business offering for the first time.
Rejection is part of the process of playing bigger in your life. WHY? Because it means you’re honoring that you DESERVE more, you are WORTHY of more and you are ready for a shift in your reality.
Rejection is part of the process for a few reasons:
1. Whatever it is you have dreamed up, the Universe may have something even BETTER in store for you. Our tiny minds have a hard time with big dreams, so consider that rejection is part of the process of aligning to how far you can go.
2. Rejection is protection. Truth bomb: You don’t know everything, SOOOOO something bigger than you is keeping an eye out for your greatest good. ???? We like to think we know what’s good for us, but most of the time, we have no clue. We also can’t predict what’s just around the corner. You are being protected, trust!
I want you to celebrate your rejections!! It means you were courageous and went after something that wasn’t a sure-fire win. That’s freaking BOLD and BEAUTIFUL! Rejection is not a sign you’re going in the wrong direction, it’s simply a redirection to what is TRULY meant for you. So go ahead, take yourself out to dinner with the rejection letter. Say thank you for the protection and declare that you can’t wait to see the magic that’s just beyond the horizon.
INNER CRITIC HIJACKING
When you push up against your comfort zone, when you dare to dream bigger, and when you are looking to stretch yourself… THAT is when your inner critics can come in and get even louder! It’s a damn good sign you are in a transformative moment. The key is to KEEP GOING!! Remember that these voices are just one part of you that’s scared, and likely from a part of your past you’d rather forget. Example: That voice could be coming from the 10-year-old version of yourself that got in trouble for pushing boundaries with a parent or authority figure.
The key is to not let those voices keep you from your power moves.
As yourself these questions:
1. What is the actual truth in the situation?
2. What other stories could my brain make up about the narrative I’m trying to fill in? (this helps your Inner Critic to see they don’t really know the truth)
3. What is my why for pushing through this self-doubt?
The quicker you can see and name these inner critic narratives, the sooner you can chose to call upon your inner cheerleader to help you in making the leap your heart truly desires.
ROADBLOCKS
The roadblocks you will likely face when you decide you want MORE will be the internal ones. When you start to ignore your limiting beliefs and honor that there is something BETTER out there for you, there is often some additional growth and lessons to learn before that big next step. Frustrating as hell? You bet. Learning those lessons sooner rather than later? INVALUABLE.
I hope you see these roadblocks as your rite of passage. I hope you see this as part of the process and not a questioning of ‘if you’re doing the right thing’. I have found that these obstacles make my conviction stronger about what I want, and prepare me for stepping more fully into my truth!
WHAT NOW? (cue, Rihanna)
I could give you a whole bunch of examples of what this looks like from my own experience and from client examples, but I won’t. Instead, I will ask you to reflect on your journey.
What examples from your own life do you have with regards to what happened when you demanded more for yourself, when you demanded more of others, or when you broke old patterns? Was the path a straight line from A to B? My guess is there was a zig and a zag – maybe even a few.
As you more fully step into this year, as you more clearly articulate and take action on what it is that you want for yourself and your future, remember this – the road can still be bumpy. It doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong path, it means you are being prepared for exactly what you need. Your trials will become your triumphs. So KEEP GOING!
If you need support as you push envelopes, dream bigger and reinvent yourself, you let me know.
For more, listen to the Episode 11: REJECTION IS PROTECTION on The Unlock Lab podcast (also available on Spotify).
Do you have a rejection story? Email me at breakthrough@toscadimatteo.com to share, I would love to hear from you.
THE UNLOCK LAB PODCAST Additional Episodes:
Episode 5: When Nothing Feels New
Episode 6: When Your World Gets Rocked
Episode 7: Inner Critics 101
Episode 8: Are You Going All In?
Ps. you can also find these episodes on Spotify.
Speaking of my podcast I will have dedicated episodes called TOSCA ALL ACCESS. I’ll be answering audience questions and providing words of wisdom to help you unlock your particular situation. To submit your questions, you can message me, or if you prefer to remain anonymous, click HERE. I’ll see you in the LAB!
Looking for more?
- Sign up for my newsletter here: www.toscadimatteo.com/optin
- Listen to my podcast: The Unlock Lab on Spotify or Apple
- Contact me to learn more about how I can support you in unleashing potential for you or your team.
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